French Tart

Crème Brulee (France)

This recipee originatid in France but I was given it by an American friend who ‘ad a ‘ouse daan there in the saaf. I met ‘im one summa an’ we got on really well. I’m awlways invitid to stay ova in august but its usually to ‘ot foa me an’ he lives in a shit’ole of a taan inhabitid by skankies an’ ner do wells. Anyway, Bill’s a great cook an’ a good friend, an’ this is one of ‘is favrit desserts that he kindly offered to me.

 

Ingredienz

Imperial                                                         Metric

One an’ a arf pintz of double creem               850ml of double cream

One vanilla pod, split lenffways                     1 vanilla pod split lengthways

Six laarge free range eggs yolks                     6 large free range eggs yolks

Five an’ arf ounzes of caastta shugga             150gms of caster shugga

Place the dish oa dishis that you are going to serve the crème brulee into the fridge to chill, at least six ‘ours befoa you wants to serve the dessert. The dish should be shallow, ‘eatproof rememberin’ that the mixture will completely fillit. These quantities will serve eight peepul so work out the amount oa size of dish, oa reduce the quantities to suit yoa needs. You ain’t fick so you should be able to divide, unless you are a norverner in which case you will need a calculator.

Put the creem an’ the vanilla pod in a strong fick sawsepan an’ bring to boilin’ point. Remove from the ‘eat an’ allow foateen minits foa the mixture to become infused wiv the pod. In anuvva bowl beat the egg yolks an’ add a tablespoon of shugga.

Lift out the vanilla pod an’ poa the creem ova the yolks, mixin’ them forrowly. Transfer the mixture to sawsepan an’ on a very low ‘eat stir continuously wiv a woodin spoon. Nah, this is where it is important to be patient an’ understand that it may take up to one’our foa the creem to ficken. Don’t be tempted to turn up the ‘eat  becawse the creem will curdle: my bird does it awl the time an’ she cheets by rescuin’ it by puttin’ it in a blenda, but it is awlways betta to do it proppa.  When the creem coats the back of yoa spoon its ready to take off the stove but keep stirrin’ as it cools.

Poa the creem into the chillt dishis, don’t worry if it’s a little runny it will ficken as it cools back in the fridge. I bought some wittle erfinware ramekins from a markit in Isle sur la Sorgue foa too euros a pop, she was right tasty, the bird that had the stall, but I was rushed foa time so I didn’t bovva wiv an attempted pull; maybe next time? They are about foa inchis in diameter an glazed on the inside, an’ they are perfect foa the crème.

Befoa yoa guests arrive, wack the grill on to a fierce ‘eat, sprinkul the caastta shugga ova the top of the crème an allow the shugga to bubble an’ melt. Lift from under the grill allowin’ the shugga to form a goldin braan shell, just like the top of mi ‘ead.

This is probably the best ‘comfort dessert’ in the entire world, an’certainly when I ain’t bovvered about sex I awlways serves it to mi bird as a substitute.